"This could really use a vacuuming" something I would never have said 2 years ago in any which way or world. When I got back about 5 days ago it was like a whirlwind that left me dizzy for a good 24+ hours that was more like the first 3 days where I had so many things to do and so much English to use to do it. I think that was the first part of culture shock that really hit the hardest was how I couldn't just say "thank you" or "have a nice night" in Japanese to everyone without the weirdest of faces (which are priceless btw), but I just knew it was coming when immigration broke my heart and put a hole in my resident card. To think that it will be a week tomorrow.
I've bought a car, gone through almost all of my old stuff (not my books), applied for a place to live in Charleston, driven over a thousand miles, celebrated a birthday, had a family dinner and truly met my niece's personality for the first time, gotten car insurance, applied for health insurance, and met a good 15+ people, and probably more that I'm forgetting yet it hasn't even been a week. I forgot how fast the U.S. can move sometimes. Also I've had a new flavor of mountain dew, and had probably 3 other bottles of it too. No one has ever called me classy with a straight face.
And I miss it. I miss being in love and enjoying it in person every day, fights included. I miss seeing my sharehouse mates and making them drink on Saturday nights, and sometimes Tuesdays. I miss the food, ugh it was to die for. I'd travel exclusively for the food if it were possible. I miss the hidden beauty in the clutter of the small town backroads. I miss the temples, the signs, the people watching, and I miss being 2 hours from an adventure that I could never imagine in my wiliest of my dreams.
I don't miss the people, their judgement, their eyes glaring a hole in my skull because of something inappropriate that I was doing (intentionally or otherwise), and just the sheer unbelievable numbers of them. I don't miss running for the trains or how bosses are hostile in almost every situation. And I don't miss some other things I can't remember, but pros and cons. Life is filled with pros and cons.
"Today is my birthday" is what one of my sweet older students told me and I just near freaked out. I was so excited, she was such a happy person. She started laughing because of the 5+ emotions that probably flashed across my face in an instant and most of those are what you would never see on that of a seasoned gaijin or a Japanese person, oh the horror. We had about 8 or 9 lessons together the past couple Fridays and even though I couldn't tell you 5 things about her now, I could tell you which student she was. And then I said "I wish I would have gotten you a gift" before we had started the lesson. And then her response brought me to tears the first time (of a few) during a lesson. "My gift is having a lesson with my favorite teacher. Because for my 70th birthday I am going to do all of my favorite things and one of those is visiting you". The tears come even now.
"Will you marry me for the weekend Mike?" Once again I am a sap. I am not going to tell you about my favorite meal of tuna or ramen, but I will tell you about this. It was Christmas, it was one of the first ones that I had spent away from home. And it was too expensive and work wouldn't even let me take Christmas Eve off so it wasn't really an option. But we got on a plane to the middle of nowhere, for an adventure I had on my bucket list but thought I would never check off my list. But I told Akito I wanted to go and then he planned it, as always. So on the plane I lost my hearing because my ear canals exploded, and it was horrifying. And on Christmas morning I was in a hospital getting a very large probe inserted into my face by a 75 year old doctor who was working his last week. And he gave me a good 70% in one ear and 25% in the other ear, and told me I wouldn't be flying back. And then I went and got to hold a fox! I got to pet a fox, play with a fox, and chase them around doing things that the signs said not to do and feed a bunch of foxes! It was awesome. And that night, I called my family to say Merry Christmas, and Akito gave me a hat, and then as we were sleeping he asked me to marry him for the weekend. We had seen it in a movie, and it became a horribly sappy tradition that happened on a couple occasion even though he only wanted to do it once or twice. I was sort of insistent and stubborn that it had to happen for no reason there after just so I could feel the joy of it all. Me? Stubborn or insistent? Never. And I said yes.
"You'll come back right?" was what so many people said to me in language after language. And I will go back, because it's my home. Japan stole a piece of my heart and I paid a price from my soul to exist there for so long, but it was worth it. If you were ever considering taking some time to travel or even going to teach English somewhere I would say 'go, why are you even still talking to me'. It was worth every moment of stress, all the anxiety, all of the culture shock, because the payment was memories, language, culture, life and above all a lot of love. I regret nothing, and I say thank you to the End and cheers to the coming beginning. I'm going to go from Mike-teacher to Doctor Mike, sounds pretty interesting right? Stay tuned.
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